I know, it has been like sixteen years and I can’t get over this one thing. But, yeah…no I can’t get over it because it made me so MAD. Like seriously, it was a buffet.


Here is what happened.


Ever since middle school, I had one dream. It was to go to the prom with this one guy. Well, life has a funny way of giving you what you want. However, it isn’t always the way you planned it in your head. That’s why we all have to be careful what we wish for as we close our eyes to go to sleep.


So, here it was junior year and I was no longer obsessed with my dream prom date. I was dating this other guy and he was all set to go to the prom with me. Maybe Mr. Boyfriend of the Moment had other reasons I didn’t know about, but the fact was it was a week before prom and he dumped me. Oh and he wasn’t going to the prom with me either. Sure, it could have been worse; I could have gotten dumped the day of the prom. At least with a week I had some time to find a back-up date.


Enter fate and my stupid wish.


Rumor had it that Mr. Dream Prom Date wasn’t going. He didn’t have a date and was seriously thinking of skipping the prom. Every good movie buff knows you CAN’T MISS the prom. So, I called Mr. Dream and was like, “here’s the deal, I got dumped, I paid for the ticket, just show up with me.” How romantic, I know. He said he would think about it and let me know soon.


I will say that he was a good sport and rushed around and got me a flower and his tux with like no time to spare. Also, he had a car and that made getting to the prom much easier. So, I do thank him for that. But there is just that one thing that to this day, I am still annoyed with.


The prom was doomed from the start. I had this hideous deep purple velvet dress that had a  “v” in the back and these strange downward cascading ruffles. In a way it was like I put the dress on backwards, but I didn’t. I asked my sister to do my make-up and I wanted that black liquid eyeliner look that was popular in like the forties (I think…you know like the pin-up girls). What I got was what I could only describe as a raccoon. My hair was a curled hot mess. I also think I remember my shoes being too big. Here I was going to the prom with my Mr. Dream date and I looked like a purple nightmare that only Tim Burton would think up.


We get to the prom and stand in a long line to get our picture taken. I know I look stupid but at this point, I am so over the whole junior prom thing that I don’t even care anymore.


Did I mention it was a combined junior and senior prom?


Anyhow, we sat at the table and everyone was lying to me about how great I looked and I was just praying for this layer of hell to be done with. We were told to go to the buffet and get our food. I can’t remember what I picked out, but I do recall having broccoli on my plate.


We sat down and I don’t think I was eating much. I was upset because I looked hideous and here I was making this poor guy suffer along with me. I should have just stayed home.


I was managing to put food in my mouth, chew and swallow then repeat. Over the dinner white noise, I heard my date say my name. I looked and then he asked me, “Could I have your broccoli?”


Inside my head, I had the image of me just throwing up my hands and screaming to everyone where they could shove this prom. On the outside, I just handed him my broccoli.


I mean, I don’t know why he needed mine. It was a buffet. There was no line and he could have gotten more. Hell, I would have even gotten it for him. But for the life of me I can’t understand why he needed my broccoli. Did he think I wasn’t going to eat it? Why did I put it on my plate if I wasn’t going to eat it?


A small little postscript: Senior prom, they served broccoli again. I was tempted to get out of my seat with my plate and offer him my broccoli. I didn’t do it because, well, I didn’t want anymore attend drawn to me and I was in heels. My luck, I would have slipped and my dinner would have met my dress. Which, ironically, was black velvet.